Before we get started on I Date, I feel I owe to all of you, dear readers, a short apology.
We are not going to match the timeline of dates indicated in this blog’s title.
There. I said it. Phew! ‘But Dave!’, I hear you cry. ‘That’s kind of a misleading title then isn’t it?‘ And you would be right, dear reader. However we have come too far to turn back now! So I ask you all to please, stay on this journey with me, despite the infrequent postings, and I prey you will go well rewarded with content and good cheer.
Now having said that, shall we turn our eyes to the letter I?
Quick: name as many activities that you can that start with the letter I. <tick tock> Not many, right? Sure, there’s Indian food, Italian food and Indonesian food annnnddd that’s about it, right?
Wrong! It stands for injustice everywhere (where’s Captain America when you need him?!). It stands for The Spanish Inquisition (nobody expected it). But perhaps most importantly, I stands for ice cream indoors! Oh sure, it wasn’t exactly the dark and stormy night that forced us to look for Inspiration Inside (with apologies to Intel), but lacking in any real motivation or finances to go anywhere, it was perfect.
The problem I have with ice cream is that it’s so temporary. We needed something else to do to really classify this as an official alphabet date. And all of a sudden it became clear. We wouldn’t just spend the rest of the night gazing into each others eyes while trying not to get distracted by the TV. We would illustrate each other.
It’s worth mentioning at this juncture that Theresa, in high school, was quite the artiste. She had a knack, you could say, for drawing. Not that this was a competition at all, but I was behind the eight ball from the start. I mean sure, I started out on the right track, trying my best to capture the shape of her body position…
…but as you can see, as soon as facial features come into play, I struggle a bit. (This isn’t a new thing for me; ever since my early high school days of playing Warhammer, I always had the Dwarf army with the worst eyes as I could never nail them).
Like all ‘good’ artists, I reverted to some tried and tested lines when explaining my final piece. “It was hard to work in this light,” I said. “And it didn’t do the subject matter justice. Hopefully you can see my neo-classical faux-modern interpretation at work.”
She seemed to like it. But then it was her turn to exact artistic revenge of sorts.
I struck what I thought was a thoughtful yet distant pose. Something that said “come closer and smell what I’m wearing” but also said “not that close you perv.”
And can I say, I think Theresa really picked up on that. Look at that stern eye line!
Editors note: this date took place on September 3, 2011.